The football’s over, so you can take down your flag and bin your vuvuzela. Corrie goes on and it’s time to pick up your glass of stout, step over that cobble and wear your hairnet with pride. And so, without any further ado, here we go with this week's Coronation Street update.
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There’s an elephant in the room when Trevor gives Janice a pachyderm present with her name spelled on it wrongly. He’s brought it all the way back from South Africa too. Now that Carla’s back on the cobbles the first thing she does is swan round to see young Tilsley-me-laddo and give him what for: “You’re a puffed up little ponce!” She thinks he’s running Underworld under the viaduct but it’s Nick’s Nicks he’s got up and running there and Carla’s not pleased. So she does what any good businesswoman would do faced with a patronising partner who’s tried to rip her off. She undercuts Nick’s bottom line in knickers with his buyer and sets out to rip him off in the pants. Go Carla, go
Anyway, the reason that Nick’s in Turner’s joinery in the first place is because Leanne rang up George and pulled in a favour to help out her ex. So when Natasha finds out that Leanne and Nick’s getting close, she tells Nick that Leanne used to be on the game but it doesn’t put Nick off and he’s still on the Battersby sniff. Leanne came out with a cracker of a line when she tells Nick that Natasha “isn’t even fit to lick my patent leather boots!” Leanne storms home in a huff and tells Peter that her past has a way of always catching up with her. He tells her that Natasha’s jealous of her relationship with Nick. “You’ve got history, they’ve only got cushion covers.”
Mary takes Hayley on a scheduled day out to look at wedding venues. It’s all itinerary and maps and Dolly Parton on CD as the motorhome heads out to a country hall. Hayley’s too polite to say much to Mary but it’s clear she’s uncomfortable being involved in Mary’s manic world. That is, until she spots a steam train running alongside the wedding hall and knows Roy would love it. I think he’d be chuffed and reckon Hayley should choo-choo-choose it now.
In the Rovers, Ciaran gets naked when he loses a bet with Michelle. He tells her he’ll cook her dinner and if she doesn’t like it, he’ll bear all behind the bar. So when he over cooks the chicken and it ends up burned, in the bin, it’s his drumsticks and chicken legs on show in the pub. And quite tasty there were too.
Over at the Barlows’ it’s Deirdre’s birthday and she’s 110. Ken gets out the best cups and Deirdre breakfasts on chocolate. A touching scene came when Ken finds a birthday card from Blanche that she’d put out, it’s from last year and Deirdre couldn’t face throwing it away last year and not having it on show this. She shares her birthday with little Simon, who’s 7 and there’s a party with jelly and kiddies and screams. And Simon’s wasn’t much better.
Lewis is still giving Deirdre the glad eye which, if you’re watching whilst you have your tea, can fair turn your stomach real bad. And his phone still rings with middle-aged women calling him for a date and then there’s Claudia who he bumps into on a night out with Audrey as they’re eating at Vito’s in Manchester (I’ve been there, it’s a real restaurant and it’s great!) and she can’t believe her blow-dry that Lewis has settled down with Audrey. Audrey tells Claudia to delete Lewis from her phone, reallah, but Claudia just gives Audrey a look and gives Lewis another.
Meanwhile, Lloyd looks after Cheryl and her son (who’s a little cracker) and she makes a decision to leave her brutal husband Chris who beats her up.
Graeme’s upset this week when he tells Tina he loves her and she doesn’t reply. He reckons he’s blown it with her and confides in Norris about his lack of love life. Norris, I know, who better to get maudlin with in the back room of a shop with a cracked cup of cheap tea?
And finally this week, Eddie and Anna’s nephew spills food colouring all over their sofa. They need a new one, a cheap one and think they know a man who can get them one but John Stape isn’t really a furniture salesman, he just likes to let the neighbours think he is and Eddie’s not a man to let a sniff of a bargain escape him. Just when John’s wondering how he can get himself out of this little furniture fix, along comes fruity Charlotte with a bottle of wine in her handbag and a glint in her eye. She wants to know if John’s heard from their mutual friend overseas, the elusive Colin Fishwick and he tells her not yet. Oh, but he will. Charlotte leaves the wine, and a chill down the spine, with John and Fiz while Chesney starts to wonder just what’s really going on.
And that's just about that for this week.
Coronation Street writers this week were John Kerr, Chris Fewtrell, Julie Jones and Jan McVerry. Find out more about the Corrie writing team here.
Blogging away merrily at http://flamingnora.blogspot.com/
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