This was the week when Carla Connor returned from el-ay, which is Los Angeles. If she’d been to Liverpool, it would’ve been ar-ay. She’s not back five minutes and she’s down on one knee in front of Tony Gordon with a little box in her hand, just big enough to have something small and special in it, like perhaps his good eye. The box houses only an elastic band, but that’s good enough for Tony to accept Carla’s proposal of marriage and the two of them will wed on Wed. Nesday this week. Or will they? Perhaps Rosie’s video of Carla snogging Liam will put a dampner on events when Carla’s pixellated e-dultery goes public.
Pat the Scotsman (no, it’s not a game) turns up for the wedding, he’s Tony brother from the frozen north who’s wondering why everyone hates his brother. Jed Stone and Kev Webster compare notes and join the I Hate Tony Gordon Fan Club as Tony’s good eye goes on manic alert.
Over at Gail’s, her kitchen gets cleaned out. Not cleaned up, cleaned out. The Windass lads break in and nick all the cupboards, the worktops, the lot. Joe installs a new one for her and Gail thinks he’s great but he’s got secrets to keep as it becomes clear he’s stony broke.
Becky has her day in court and Steve turns up at the last minute to lie through his teeth and save Becky’s skin. Up in the public gallery sits Blanche Hunt with her bag of mints, taking in the scene below of Steve admitting to having it away with barm cake Becks. Steve and Becky beg Blanche to keep schtum, which she’s done for now, for free drinks in the pub. But then Steve and Becky get a room and do it, you know, it, and he tells her he loves her and that he’ll leave Michelle. He even puts Operation Bad Boyfriend into action. Meanwhile, Jason wows Becky with a bit of a chat and a goldfish in a bag. So Becky’s torn, you know. On the one hand there’s Steve who’s a bit simple and gawps like a puppy every time they meet and on t’other there’s Jason who’s dim, with a fish. And in the middle there’s Becky who’s bright enough to know better but probably never will.
Norris meets his nemesis when he goes to collect second prize in the Cliff Richard competition and comes face to face with competition winner, Mary Taylor. He’s quite smitten, is Norris, especially when Mary asks him to go along with her to the gig. Rita and Jed can’t believe that Norris has pulled as Mary is a little bit younger than Norris. “If it doesn’t work out, you can always adopt her,” says Rita. Norris and Rita almost had a falling out this week when she dissed Sir Cliff, the Peter Pan of Pop and Norris won’t hear a bad word said against.
Graeme starts work in the butchers this week but doesn’t take it too seriously. To brighten his day, he threatens Norris with two pork chops, forcing him to guess which blockbuster movie he’s acting out. “It’s A Porkaclypse now, geddit?” he asks Norris, who clearly doesn’t.
Deirdre’s back from Lourdes this week, having helped old ladies on the loo on the French trip. She and Ken hover around Peter, wondering what he’s done with or to Simon but he seems to have things under control as he gets to grips with Leanne while farming his son out to play with Ashley’s lads. He’s growing a moustache, is Peter, and in soap land facial hair can only mean one thing; Peter Barlow is a villain of the most devilish kind. Just you wait and see, he’ll be twirling that tash while doing a nasty chortle any day soon.
And that’s just about that for this week.
Coronation Street writers this week were Joe Turner, Mark Burt, David Bowker and David Lane.
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